3/5/7

I didn't have a good day. It was long. Hard. Tiring. Painful. But I'm still alive, and the part of my day that I dreaded the most wasn't the worst of it. Strangely enough, it was the least of my problems.

Getting started today wasn't too hard. I was prepared to do this, it's time. No turning back. I was more or less ready. And you know what? Despite some hiccups, it wasn't so bad. I didn't get a favourable result, but at least this time I can say I did okay. Not bad for someone who hasn't done it in 4 years.

But that's not why I'm writing this entry. You wanna know what else happened? Well, I got sick. It started before that 'thing', and I got it under control during its execution. But keeping it that way after it was over was hard. All I wanted to do was go home and rest. I felt so sick and tired, made worse by my mum, who didn't want to keep...mum. Yeah, story of my life. Go figure.

I couldn't go home just yet, had to wait for my sister to get off work, and pick her up. Since I was sick, I got her to drive us home. I fell asleep in the back seat, and all was fine, until..........BAM! Someone apparently crashed into our car from the back. And I was in the back seat, so yeah, not very pleasant. We're all fine, thank God. A young girl had tailed us from behind and didn't apply the brakes in time. But no one was injured or worse, which is good. The weird part was having a couple of guys approach my sister and the other girl, offering to fix the damages. We call them vultures haha. And I finally got home, with a fever. Damn. I'm better now after some medication, but it still lingers.

So I sit before my trusty computer, less than an hour till Friday. Not feeling 100% better, but I do know I have to try to make it to work tomorrow. I can't let some people down, now can I? But you know something? Prior to all this, I kept questioning myself. Asked myself, what's wrong with me? Why are there some things that I still can't solve? Why do I feel like a mess most of the time? Why do I feel like I haven't grown up deep down inside? Why do I feel like I've disappointed so many people I care about?

Questions I don't want to think about right now. Now I just need to sleep.