Spark. Drive. Stuff.

Once again, I'm gonna combine stuff to talk about in one entry. This is what happens when I have things to say but I keep putting it off to say them.


What you're looking at here is the cover of Marit Larsen's new album Spark, which will be released in Norway next month. As far as covers go, I think this is the best one she's done so far.

However, her first single Coming Home is just so-so for me. It's by no means bad, but it merely reinforces the fact that Marit hasn't changed her approach very much. I don't know if the rest of her CD sounds like that, but I am hoping that there are a few, if not a handful of worthy gems in it. I am counting on Marit taking a few risks every now and then and not sounding like her last two albums. Either way, if Spark makes it here, I'll get it. After all, she's still Marit, and I'm still a collector by nature.


That is the poster to Drive, a very critically acclaimed film starring Ryan Gosling. Gosling plays a talented stunt car driver who moonlights as a getaway driver for criminals at night. He gets into trouble with a mob boss when he takes on a job in order to help a young woman and her son square things with them.

I was looking forward to this film. Very much. And what does the film's distributors do? They pull it from the theaters.

AFTER they had screened it for the press. AFTER they had planned to release it last month. AFTER they had a free screening for lucky winners of a radio station's call-in contest. Their reason? 'A technical problem'. Right. Here's my response: Fuck you.

Technical problem? Why don't you explain to us what the heck that means? The censors blocked it? If so, you can just say that. Or is it because you don't have the balls to put it out there and have it compete against films YOU idiots think would do better than it? Is that it? You think audiences here would rather see Johnny English Reborn or What's Your Number or The Smurfs?

See, all you have to do is ask moviegoers if we want to see it. Have a poll, play the trailer in cinemas, find a way to ask us. Get your theater guys to put it on their Facebook page and gauge their reaction. Or better yet, activate your FUCKING Facebook page! How the heck are you supposed to know if you don't find out?

I know Drive is worth your trouble. It has an 8.3 rating on Imdb, it's the 133rd highest rated film right now. Any film within the top 250 is worth it. You bastards just squandered an opportunity to show audiences what may be the best film of the year. Last year The Town gets axed, this year it's Drive. I seriously hate film distributors here. If they don't have guts to risk their finances on something they are too ignorant about, the least they can do is be honest about it.


Lately I've been feeling rather annoyed by people. Mostly by people who think they're the centre of the universe, or they think their superbly lame jokes are funny, or they have this irresistible need to say whatever's on their mind, and most of the time it's not important at all.

I wish they would all just shut up. Seriously. I mean, how much inconsequential crap can you give every day? You know, the funny thing is, I actually thought for a short time that I had lost my sense of humour, which was why I found all of this so annoying. But no, I can still laugh, it's just that people don't care about good humour anymore. They just go with whatever they've got.

Like for instance, how many times would you laugh if people constantly put Rowan Atkinson's face on someone else's picture? First time, maybe. Second time, not really. Anything beyond that, and it's really fucking stupid. I'm on Facebook, and lately there's always some doofus doing this crap. Then it gets shared over and over, and even if you're not friends with this doofus, chances are one of your friends thinks it's cool. Really, I beg you to stop. Please. Get a life.

And for the rest of you, who have to say EVERY God damn thing in your head, shut up too. You got a job, you got a life, so do it and live it. I don't care what you ate yesterday, I don't care why you were late for work yesterday, I don't care when was the last time you slipped on the sidewalk, or what your nephew says to you when he sees you. Shut it. Whether you're online or in front of me, (or even if you're in front of others) stop it. Do what matters. Say what matters. Live your life by being a good person. Don't gossip, don't waste time talking about trivial stuff. Do what you love as long as you don't annoy or hurt others. It's not too much to ask, is it?


That's it. I'm gonna look for something to do. See you.

Angry Birds

You must have heard about the Angry Birds game by now, even if you've never played it before.

I just gave it a try this afternoon, and I can see why it's so addictive.

The object of the game is simple: catapult a bird using a slingshot and take down the house that holds a bunch of green pigs that have stolen the birds' eggs. Estimating the trajectory and finding the weak spot of the house, which can be made up of glass, wood and rocks, are crucial to advancing throughout the game.

Apparently this game has become so popular that stuffed toys and T-shirts have been made for them. I hear they're making a movie based on this game to be released in 2014. That's just insane.

So if you're looking for some harmless fun, give Angry Birds a shot. Find it on Facebook or download it on your phone or something.

In Her Honor

Wishing many happy returns of the day to Ira. This song is for her.

Douchebag Of The Year

I came across this story a few days ago. There was an incident in a movie theatre in Texas, where a woman asked the man sitting in front of her to turn off his phone. He was texting at the time, and the light from his phone was distracting her. She merely tapped him on the shoulder, but he apparently got injured and threw a fit, then he called management and the cops showed up. In the end, she was fined $260 for assault. Because she lives outside of Texas, it would be more expensive if she had to come back and fight the charges, so she paid the fine.

The woman, Brenda Godwin, who is 136 pounds, said this:

"He had his phone out. The light was shining at me. I'm thinking, 'He's going to turn it off.'" But he didn't. 'OK, this is ridiculous.' So I reached over and tapped him on the shoulder. It was very bright. I was only trying to get his attention. He whipped around and said, 'Don't ever touch me.' I was a little taken aback. 'I wouldn't have touched you if you didn't have your phone out.' "He jumps up and whirls around towards me and says, 'I am charging you with assault,' and he flew out of the theater."


The man, 220 pound Dale Fout, had this to say:


"I got a text, and I responded to it because it was something important. It was something that was on a deadline situation, OK. I held it against my chest purposely where I could barely see it. ... I could text but hide the majority of the light coming from the phone. "She said something. I couldn't make it out. That's why I turned. She was probably saying something like, 'Get off your phone.' I turned, and she pushed. She just happened to push my neck at the time my neck was in an awkward position. Kinda like having a little fender bender, and you get a little whiplash in your neck, you know."

(I'm going to let you process the stupidity of this story for a moment. OK, ready? Now, here's my opinion.)

How does anyone let this superbly insane miscarriage of justice occur? Someone gets charged for assault for asking someone to turn off their phone when they're supposed to in the first place? What kind of world do we live in?

As a frequent movie theatre visitor, I'll be the first to agree that lights emanating from someone's phone is very distracting. It doesn't matter if they're in front of you, across the aisle or ten rows down. As long as you're behind them, you'll see it. It's a dark theatre, so there's no way you won't notice. And I hate these people, who think that it's okay to play with their phone while the movie's running.

Mr Dale Fout here is not only the douchebag of the year, but he's probably made of glass too, since a considerably lighter woman supposedly injured him. That's a load of crap. If he's injured, it's probably because he turned his neck, not because someone tapped him. He should not be texting in the first place anyway, and now because of him, an innocent woman is $260 poorer.

Why do people always come to the movie theatre when they don't really want to watch a movie? These people never fail to piss me off, doing the things they shouldn't do, like talking, kicking your chair, shaking their legs, bringing kids who aren't going to watch the film, answering their phone or texting on the phone.

What amazes me is how so many of them think that texting is okay because answering the phone isn't. Do these idiots think I'm blind, that I wouldn't notice? I mean, what is so fucking important that you can't turn the damn thing off for two hours? Mr Fout here claims it's important, a "deadline situation". So why is he in there watching a movie? Why can't he just sit by himself away somewhere like his office, his car or some fucking park bench and deal with it?

The worst part is, there are also people who text because they aren't interested in watching what's on screen, or they think multitasking in the theatre is okay. I am telling you, it is NOT. If you aren't interested in the movie, then walk out. It's that simple. You can do what you like, just not in the theatre. I'm not stopping you from texting, just don't do it in front of me. Is that so much to ask?

I still love going to the theatre to watch a film, it's still the best way to enjoy the movies. But these days it's getting harder thanks to people like Dale Fout. I sincerely hope the next time he uses his cellphone in the cinema, someone there breaks his neck for real.